Stop Trying to Fill the Void

When your mind is built around a hole.

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You can’t fill a hole with lies.

My fun ended when the party moved on, and I returned to the hotel alone. Part of me wanted to follow them, and the other part knew that eventually my family would report me as missing. After all, I was in charge of the chores. The hole grew back almost immediately.

Lies can make the hole feel bigger.

It just so happened that one of the guys I’d lied to caught up with me. We talked for a while, kicking through the tide. Then he asked how come my family didn’t talk with an accent like I did.

The hole comes from somewhere.

Everyone has a hole of some kind that we’re trying to fill. Before you can deal with it, you’ve got to understand its backstory.

What to do instead of filling the hole.

Some of us will do anything to close that void. But you can’t. For us, it’s a baseline state. So you just have to acclimate.

How psychopaths deal with people.

Some of us fall somewhere between the poles of autism and psychopathy. We wind up faking a lot of the emotions we’re expected to show everyone. Acting normal consumes loads of energy.

How psychopaths deal with adversity.

You struggle to understand emotions. Not because you’re a heartless bitch. But because your entire nervous system responds differently to stress and adversity. Honestly, danger makes you feel alive.

How psychopaths love.

We make a decision to, every day. We carry out the actions of love and kindness. Not out of instinctual empathy. Some of us just learn that you can’t live a meaningful life without some kind of social bond. It’s just not going to be the warm, fuzzy kind.

Navigate the void.

A psychopath isn’t that different from anyone else. Everyone feels tempted to lie and cheat. We all struggle with empathy.

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