Punch Your Guilt in the Face

You have to keep reminding yourself what’s important.

Guilt sneaks up on us all. Not in dark allies. No, it waits under the bed. Sometimes with a garrote. We lose sleep over the off chance we let someone down. Neglected that favor. Forgot that email. Left work early to take care of some errands. Took a nap in our office. How dare we.

Last week someone spotted me on campus.

“Taking a half day?” he joked.

“No,” I said and waved the form in my hand. “I’m trying to help a student with a medical problem.”

She was failing all of her classes, and wanted to withdraw. But the university wouldn’t let her without a memo signed by her professors and five other people. The student couldn’t handle the stress, so I was doing it. The dean teased me before signing the form.

“You’re costing us a lot of money,” he said.

The provost wasn’t in his office. So I left the form for his signature. Three days later, it came back to me unsigned, with a note. He chided me for putting such an imposition on him.

Or at least I think so. Sloppy handwriting.

Guilt can creep up from your personal life, too. My dad once mentioned he felt abandoned when I moved an entire state away to pursue…