If You’re Miserable, This is Why

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Dan Russo on Unsplash

You gave up on something you’re good at

At some point rejection and tepid support finally wore you down. Every little success you enjoyed brought on a string of crushing failures. Everyone said you were talented, but they didn’t care enough to show up for your play, your performance, your game, or your book signing.

You think too much

There’s two kinds of thought — active, and idle. Active thought happens when you apply your mind to concrete problems.

You attend too many pointless meetings

Meetings evolved out of the 40-hour work week, to fill up time. This is where people go to feel important and/or less lonely. They announce ambitious projects they have no real desire to complete. We use meetings to make us feel productive, when we could actually be doing things. Some meetings are mandatory, but most aren’t. We’ve just tricked ourselves into thinking so. We worry that if we skip meetings, we’ll look lazy. Stop worrying about what you might look like to other people.

You give away your time

Someone’s always got a mouth loaded with nonsense and the craving for a captive audience. There’s nothing wrong with telling someone you’re busy. You’re the one who gets to decide what to do with your day — or at least parts of it. Don’t turn manners into shackles. You know what’s rude? Dropping in on someone unannounced and blowing up their focus.

You play victim with yourself

Bad things happen to good people all the time. A police report lists you as a “victim,” but that’s a legal term. Victims wait for justice to happen, and they wish for their lives to get back to normal. Survivors demand justice. They tell their stories. They work on their recovery. They get counseling. They know their lives won’t ever be the same, and they know that sometimes wrongdoers get off easier than they should. They don’t forgive or forget or “move on,” but they do build a new life for themselves.

You eat like crap

This isn’t really your fault. Fast food chains and junk food juggernauts set us up for failure. They don’t care about your health, just your money. And it really shows. They want to sell you as many cheap, over-processed, worthless hamburgers as possible.

You don’t exercise

This one’s also not entirely on you. American suburbs used to have sidewalks. Now, lots of them don’t. Not everyone has access to nice, quiet parks where they feel safe — even in broad daylight.

You don’t get good sleep

And who can blame you? We’ve lit the night so bright you can’t even see stars anymore. We’re conditioned to check our email “one last time” for any important updates from work.

You let your leaders off the hook

It’s harder to be happy than ever. For most of us, almost half our paycheck goes toward student loans and credit cards. The idea of owning a house sounds like a fairy tale to the average millennial. We barely climb out of one recession before we start worrying about the next one. Everywhere we turn, some corporate giant wants to profit off our hardships.

Self-care needs to get political

If you really want to take care yourself, snap out of it. Part of the reason you’re unhappy is because your leaders are terrible. Most of them don’t care about our happiness. They’re undermining it for their own benefit. They want what’s left of your disposable income, so they can continue wolfing down Big Macs and yelling at people online.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store