How to Handle Rejection in Dating

It’s not always about you.

The biggest mistake in dating

Both guys and girls make the same huge misstep in dating — and that’s not understanding when they’re being rejected.

Don’t make such a big deal out of it

Let’s say a girl ghosts and then suddenly starts texting you again. Big deal. Wait to see if she even tries to offer an explanation.

Encourage her to tell the truth

You’d be surprised how many guys and girls keep dating someone just because they’re afraid to be honest.

Think about why you got rejected

A little post-game analysis never hurt anyone. You don’t want to beat yourself up, but it’s always worth your time to reflect.

Sometimes you’re just not compatible

In my 20s, I went on tons of dates with very attractive guys. Half of them wanted to go to law school, get married, and have their first kid by the age of 25. That’s not what I wanted at all.

One question you can always ask

Other times, I’ve been the one sending mixed signals without realizing it. At one point in my life I thought dating was literally just hanging out with someone until passion unexpectedly overtook you. Until then, you were supposed to pretend to be friends.

Subtle signs she’s not into you

There’s a lot of stuff girls do that come off as manipulative or deceptive, when they’re really just trying to be discrete.

  • Ending a date early with a lame excuse
  • Insisting on paying her half of dinner/drinks
  • Responding to texts just a little too late
  • Not talking a whole lot
  • Not making eye contact
  • Acting aloof and distant

Don’t get hung up on yourself

If someone goes on a date with you, odds are they’ve already decided you’re attractive. It’s something else they didn’t like.

Maybe you do need to change

Dating has a way of holding up a mirror. You see yourself through lots of different lenses.

The best fix for rejection is a break

It doesn’t matter if we’re talking about love and dating or your career. At some point, you have to retreat and spend some time taking care of yourself. One of the best things I ever did was spend a full year off the dating circuit. (Actually, it was about 10 months.)

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