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4 Simple Things Men I Know Wish More Women Understood
#3 — they hate the term “alpha male.”
Her dad invited them up to his cabin that weekend to watch the game. He didn’t want to go. She made him. She cracked jokes in the car. “Sometimes I can’t believe you’re a guy.”
“At least I’m driving,” he said. “Is this going to take all night? Because I have a ton of work to do.”
“Just relax,” she said. “Have a few beers.”
“So many calories…”
My friend didn’t have a good time. His girlfriend and her dad spent the entire night making fun of him. He didn’t understand the first thing about football, except maybe what the word “touchdown” meant. A few beers in, her dad challenged him to a pull-up contest.
My friend won. He could do 12.
Her dad laughed. “Well, you’re not a complete wimp.”
As you can imagine, that relationship only lasted about nine months. He dumped her, mainly because she kept pressuring him to perform a persona that didn’t suit him. There was a constant state of tension and discomfort that permeated their time together. He couldn’t articulate any of this until years later, but he was feeling something women are all too familiar with — the pressure to conform to gender stereotypes. Low and behold, it cuts both ways. We just don’t think about how often it affects men. Even men don’t think about it that much. Maybe if one of them had known what was going on, they could’ve talked about it productively.
It might’ve saved them.
Here’s four things I’ve learned that guys generally don’t want to do in a relationship, even though our culture still seems to expect it. This kind of knowledge could rescue a couple:
1. He doesn’t want to pretend to love sports.
Some men don’t like sports. It doesn’t matter if we’re talking football or soccer. They’re just not into it.
A lot of people still cling to stereotypes. They think if men don’t like watching sports, they must be flabby pushovers.
That’s not true.
Let’s define “sports.” Plenty of men still enjoy fitness. They run. They hike. They…
